5 Important Things Women Should Do Before Getting Married

5 Important Things Women Should Do Before Getting Married

I used to have a friend — a young woman like me, but married. She had no job, no skill, and no source of income except for the small money her husband gave her for home upkeep.

That my friend was money-minded like me, but her husband didn’t allow her to work or do any business. She was always broke — so broke that sometimes, to make a simple phone call, she would ask me to visit her and borrow my phone. At times, she would borrow money from me or from neighbors she talked with.

It wasn’t her fault to be broke. She was willing to work. She even wanted me to teach her my Zobo business, but her husband said no.

That experience taught me lessons that every young woman in a serious relationship should learn before saying “I do.”
Here are five important things every woman should do before getting married.

1. Learn a Skill Before Marriage

I once asked my friend if she didn’t learn any skill before marriage, and she said no.
This is one of the biggest mistakes many young women make.

Sis, I hope you learn from this. Learn something — anything. Learn a vocational skill, a digital skill, or even something in tech.

Even if you’re a graduate, don’t rely only on your certificate. The truth is, not every man will support his wife working a 9–5 job or being a career woman. Some men prefer their wives to stay at home.

But if you have a skill, you’ll still be able to earn from the comfort of your home. You won’t have to beg or borrow when things get tough.

A skill gives you independence, dignity, and a voice. It keeps you from being financially helpless. Marriage is not a financial plan; it’s a partnership. And every partnership works better when both people have something to offer.

Even the Bible says in Proverbs 31 that the virtuous woman “works with her hands” and provides food for her household. Be that kind of woman — skilled, strong, and wise.

2. Have a Hobby or Personal Interest

Sometimes, my married friend would call me to come over just to keep her company. She would either sleep all day or sit lonely, looking for someone to talk to.

I always thought, if only she had a hobby, she wouldn’t feel so bored and lonely.

Ladies, listen — marriage doesn’t cure loneliness. We were taught that marriage means companionship, but the truth is, companionship starts from within.

Before you marry, discover what makes you happy on your own. Have a hobby that brings you joy and peace. It could be reading, writing, crocheting, gardening, drawing, or baking.

Having a hobby keeps you active, creative, and mentally healthy. It helps you fight loneliness, idleness, and even depression. Because the truth is, your husband will not always be available to fill your emotional tank.

When you have your own interests, you become whole — not half waiting for someone to complete you.

3. Discuss Financial Plans Before Marriage

Before marriage, stop asking only shallow questions like, “What’s your favorite food?” or “What color do you like?”

Ask real questions — deep financial questions.

Ask him:

• “What are your financial goals?”

• “Do you believe a wife should work or run a business?”

• “How do you feel about joint accounts?”

• “What’s your opinion about your wife having her own savings?”

Many women realize too late that their husbands are against everything that gives them financial freedom. Don’t wait till you are married to find out.

If he says, “My wife won’t work,” then you must ask yourself, “Can I live with that?”

Money is one of the top causes of frustration and divorce in marriages. Don’t let ignorance lead you into financial slavery. Discuss it early, clearly, and confidently.

4. Have Some Savings Before Marriage

Sis, don’t enter marriage empty-handed.

If my friend had some savings before she got married, she wouldn’t have had to borrow money from friends and neighbors just to survive.

You need to have savings — ₦200k, ₦500k, ₦1m, or even more, depending on your capacity. That savings could be your safety net one day.

It can help you when:

• Your husband loses his job.

• The marriage becomes abusive and you need to leave.

• You want to start a business.

• Or you simply need to stand on your own for a while.

Savings give you strength, confidence, and stability. It reminds you that even in marriage, you are still an individual with your own financial security.

Remember, a woman with savings is a woman with options.

5. Have Good Friendships with Other Women

This is very important. Girlfriend-to-girlfriend friendship cannot be overemphasized.

My presence in my married friend’s life was emotionally supportive — and sometimes financially, too. That’s what true sisterhood means.

But let me say this — not all friendships are healthy. When you build friendships with other women, make sure they are mutual and supportive, not parasitic.

Don’t be the friend who is always receiving, always asking, always taking. Be the kind of friend who also gives — emotionally, spiritually, and financially when you can.

Yes, I later cut off that my friend because our friendship became one-sided. It was draining.

So, ladies, don’t cut off your good female friends after engagement or marriage. You will need them someday — for advice, emotional balance, or even just to laugh together again.

Marriage can be beautiful, but without true friendship and support, it can feel like an island.

FINAL THOUGHTS: PREPARE BEYOND THE WEDDING GOWN

Ladies, marriage is beautiful, but preparation makes it peaceful and enjoyable.
Don’t just prepare for wedding gowns, makeup, and honeymoon pictures. Prepare for real life after saying “I do.”

Build yourself spiritually, emotionally, and financially.
Because when you walk into marriage as a strong, wise, and prepared woman — you bring peace, confidence, and balance into that union.

The Proverbs 31 woman wasn’t just beautiful; she was skilled, hardworking, and respected because she was prepared.

So, while the world is shouting about weddings, may you prepare for marriage — with strength, skill, wisdom, and grace.

Because at the end of the day, a well-prepared woman is not just a wife — she is a blessing, a backbone, and a light in her home. 💛